I just realize that i'll be 20 in a couple hours. I dont know that i supposed to happy or sad. I also realize about so many things that i've been through. I also realize that its not always happy and fun. sometimes theres are pain and tears. but i know that god always help me in everything. He never leave me alone. even i fail him. i made so many mistake. he always forgive me and stand beside me, he guide me, everywhere. Sometime i dont wanna listen to his voice, but he still whisper.
honestly, im not excited for my bday this year. i dont know why. i wasn't excited for new year last month, and now im not excited for my own bday. isnt it weird? So not me, right??. every year, i always wait and count the day till my bday coming up. but now, nooo. i dont feel that way. maybe this is because so many problem goin on in this 2010. padahal baru juga bulan ke3.hehehhehehe
For this year i just want to be more mature, everyday become closer to God, and my behavior getting better and better each day. I dont wanna ask for rich husband, new bag, new shoes, or this and that. I just want to be a better person. Actually i really want a green card tho, coz i relly wanna be come a us citizen. But i think, it not wise if i force god to give me that freaking green card.=) so from now i wanna learn to surrender all my life, all my future, problem, everything to you GOD!
Welcome 20 years old!!! Thank god for another year=)
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